In Shakespeare’s play, King Lear (4.1.32), The worst is not, so long as we can say, “This is the worst.” How many times have you heard someone say that it can’t get any worse than this? I know that I’ve heard it number of times, especially when companies are laying off people or shutting down.
Worse and worst are relative terms – obviously evaluated by each person differently. We forget often that we walk in our shoes all the time. We don’t really have an appreciation for the ordeals that others go through – or the ability or stamina that they exert daily to maintain their lives.
Just because it is a terrible time in one person’s life doesn’t mean that things are necessarily bad all over. A Tale of Two Cities, by Charles Dickens, opens with, “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times…” The opening paragraph is illustrative of comparing good times and bad. Google it if you are curious.
An unemployed person has many choices. Our comfort zone prevents us from exercising many of them. We typically apply for something similar what we did – after all, that’s where we have experience. I’ve had the opportunity to be unemployed for more than a year a couple times. My choices were not always the best, but they seemed to be the best at the time.
As we approach a very low point in our lives, we make choices based on expediency, fear, convenience and several other factors. Expediency – we need something now – we have to pay bills, etc. Convenience – we don’t have to move or change many other things in our lives.
Fear causes physical and emotional changes in our bodies. Many times we have no control over it. Yet, fear can be approached and overcome. Fear is a perception at a time in your life. It is built, developed and maintained in your subconscious mind. The fear itself is one thing, but your opinion of how you will fail if you attempt it is the limiting factor.
Fears have to be confronted. How do you do that? The first thing to do is tell yourself that it is not the worst of times – and, that it can’t get any worse than it is now. Both are defeating affirmations that reinforce and cement those thoughts into your brain and make them more believable.
Being in charge is the first thing you must do. Say, “I am in charge of my life, my destiny.” Let your subconscious mind know that you are willing to make decisions and take charge. It doesn’t happen with one statement – it has to become part of your psyche.
You have to look at the bright side. You cannot see it at this time because the shades have been pulled down over your eyes. Affirmations and visualizations are your two friends. I would also add Emotional Freedom Techniques – they work for many situations.
You have to get your brain in gear to overcome those ‘temporary’ fears that are holding you back. It’s interesting, if you look back in your life at those times things seem so bad then, and you were really worried about the future – how did they turn out? Did you not overcome them with or without your help?
Keep focused on what you want, and don’t exclude options that seem illogical or unreasonable. They seem that way because you allow them to seem that way. Get control of your attitude next.
Your self-image and self-esteem need bolstering and only you can do it. Spend some time working on you – invest the time necessary to uncover the real you that has been hidden by years of negative programming.